From the
Razor to the Rosary
I sat there, focusing on
finishing my dinner while Deb worked hard shielding my ears from the din my mom
was making. She was being utterly ridiculous and out of her mind again. Sue
held me tight while Cat told me she would be meeting me later and went off to
the washroom to sharpen her nails.
Still, despite Deb’s efforts, I
could still hear the rubbish my mom was ranting shrewdly non-stop. I couldn’t
be more dissed. She’s just got nothing better to do. Spite me with her snide
remarks and yell in my ear about some crap, that’s her favorite past-time.
I tried to maintain my composure
and poker face while trying to stifle a laugh.
She was now screeching a long
list of profoundly noble things she did for me and how I was being an
ungrateful brat and not showing that I’m thankful.
e.g.: Giving birth to me. I
almost choked on my noodles.
Oh my god. I adore you so much.
I really thankful for that.
I felt like screaming in her
face.
“Just quit it! Did I ask to be born? That’s actually the most
unfortunate thing that ever happened in my life!”
I didn’t actually say that, but I
almost did.
She ranted on, slamming me for
every single action I did ever since I stepped foot on Earth and every bit of
thing she did for me that I was supposed to be really thankful for.
Yeah, really.
Though, I just carried on with
my noodles as though nothing too bothersome was happening. It’s a flair I have
for acting nonchalant about earthly matters. Much of the credit goes to Deb,
too, I mustn’t forget. She’s usually doing the job of blocking out the noise,
so I can carry on with my life largely undisturbed by some lesser mortals.
Bitch please.
I ate my last strand of noodle
and went back to my room, Deb slamming the door behind me. No more noise. Good.
I remembered Cat waiting for me.
Indeed she was. On the bed she sat, with her (freshly) sharpened, polished
nails. Her face lit up at the sight of me.
“Ready?”
I nodded, holding out my hand.
Once again, she slid those
fingernails down my skin. There was a warm, fuzzy feeling. My soul lifted. My
lips curled into a smile.
After it was all over, I wiped
off the blood and chucked the blood-stained tissues into the bin. Looking at my
split skin, an overwhelming rush of guilt suddenly washed over me.
I feel good.
But I am letting her hurt me.
Is this right?
Sue and Deb sat in a corner
watching silently, neither of them coming forward to stop Cat or say anything
about the matter.
Isn’t Deb supposed to protect me
from getting hurt? Why isn’t she stopping Cat?
I didn’t know. I didn’t want to
ask them either. Suddenly I had a feeling they mightn’t be here to help after
all.
I let the matter slip out of my
head as bedtime approached and Izzy arrived, knocking me over with a bear hug.
